I’m tired of playgin charades with life.
I’m tired of trying things I can’t do.
I’m tired of saying things I can’t say.
I’m tired of standing up over things not worth standing up over.
I’m tired of questioning the point of life.
I’m tired of sticking out amongst the crowd.
I’m tired of argueing over stupid shit.
I’m tired of laughing just to appeal to others.
I’m tired of thinking as much as I feel like I think.
I’m tired of practicing just to keep up a reputation.
I’m tired of debating over the right or wrong.
I’m tired of waiting over the nothing to come.
I’m tired of trying to make peace when we have so much war.
I’m tired of being the good guy.
I’m tired of being the bad guy.
I’m tired of acting happy go lucky.
I’m tired of thinking as sad as the rain.
I’m tired of acting skilled beyond belief.
I’m tired of being utterly useless.
I’m tired of being so incredibly stupid.
I’m tired of feeling so disgusting.
I’m tired of expecting things of others.
I’m tired of expecting things of myself.
I’m tired of trying to meet the standards.
I’m tired of trying to shape the community into what I think it should be.
I’m tired of talking when I want to be quiet.
I’m tired of sitting and listening when I want to run and hide.
I’m tired of trying to spark light in the darkness.
I’m tired of trying to tell myself I can make it if I try my best and get back up.
I’m tired of being so full of myself.
I’m tired of thinking so depressingly.
I’m tired of soaking up attention when attention is not due.
I’m so incredibly tired with living life that it makes me want to stop and never start again.
But is that really a reason to take the breath out of my lungs?
Should quitting life be an option when I’ve grown tired of participating in this giant game?
I don’t think quitting life ever will be a mandatory option.
I’m not depressed.
I’m not mentally challenged.
I’m not addicted to drugs.
I’m not broken beyond repair.
I’m not spiritually ill.
I’m not physically slurring.
I’m not living an unfortunate life.
But why am I thinking so hard, breathing so heavy, and shaking so much?
I don’t need to see a psychiatrist.
I don’t need to get a good nights rest.
I don’t need to live a better life.
I don’t need to breath fresher air.
I just need to live like myself.
All I need is to take a much needed break.
I’m not going to change who I am,
I’m going to change who you think I am.
I won’t come back a different person,
as I won’t leave to begin with.
I’m not going to break up friendships,
nor am I going to apologize for the broken ones.
I will however apologize for taking up so much of your time.
Thank you to whoever reads this, it makes me truely happy to know that some people will take the time out of their day to stop and read my boring and nonsensical rant over life <3
I’m taking a break from being me.
I’m taking a break from owning Project T, from helping out on DG, from PvPing on Jupiter, from building on SR, and from bartering with insanity.
I’m not trying to become an attention whore.
I’m not trying to ask for help.
I’m just letting the community know,
that things might be a bit different from here on out.
Welcome to the present,
I’ll see you in the future
Oh, also, my PC is kinda broke so it’s not like I have too many choices